Aropax® Nation

Closure

2007-04-15T22:03:00.000+10:00

There's a lot to do when you're packing up your life. When I left Melbourne I had about five months from knowing I had the job to departure. Now I have a matter of weeks.

The hardest thing is saying goodbye to people. Thanks to everyone in Canberra who I have spoken to recently - you've been lovely and you're making leaving far for difficult than it would be otherwise!

Nevertheless, it feels right. And as of tonight, I'm able to leave on civilised terms with everyone in this town (to the best of my knowledge) and that is amazing.

This is my last week at work and then I have a few days to pack up before I leave. I've also decided to wrap up this blog as of this post. It's been a fantastic outlet, but I won't be able to continue it in my new job and now is as good a time as any.

Thanks to all of you who have read this blog and been supportive over the last eighteen months.

Goodnight. And good luck.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: closing-time

Harbour city dreams

2007-04-04T22:09:00.000+10:00

The news has come through and it looks like I'm going to be making the trip up the Federal Highway to Sydney to start my new career. What's my new career, you may ask? I'll give you a hint - it's going to be a conflict of interest to keep this blog running under it's current name.

I suspect things are going to move very quickly indeed, which is just as well. It's hit me hard in the last 24 hours how absolutely wrenching it's going to be leaving this place. When I moved to Canberra from Melbourne three years ago, I was determined to make a proper go of things and make a life for myself up here. It would be oh-so-much-easier if I had failed. Many of my best friends from my time here have already left, but there's a long list of people who make my life better by their presence - and I am going to miss them terribly.

Over and above the sense of loss and sadness is the guilty feeling that comes from knowing how it feels to be the abandoned one - the person left behind. I have to let that feeling go or it will drive me mad. But today it has overwhelmed me.

So with a heavy heart I start to make serious plans for my future.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: leaving; new-life; old-life; sadness

Waiting room blues

2007-04-02T21:28:00.000+10:00

Five or six weeks ago, I applied for a new job. A new job in a new town. It seemed like the kind of thing I would have a chance with and it was worth testing out further. I figured it would be a long process and I could just put it at the back of my mind and get on with things. Of course it never works out that way.

Tonight marks the end of a period of limbo. I've spent the past month at least putting my life on hold and avoiding new commitments and involvements. I feel like I'm abandoning everyone and everything in my life and I want to get away from that feeling. There are people I just can't see at the moment because of the questions they ask me that I can't answer.

To date I've made it through two rounds of interviews, psychometric testing and a mock presentation and the field has narrowed to me and one other person. By all reports the company is having trouble splitting us. We're very different but apparently equally suitable. I can imagine them meeting this afternoon and flipping a coin to settle it.

My housemate described it as being like Schrödinger's Cat - the idea that if you don't know the result of something, you're in two states simultaneously. She's exactly right. Some time this afternoon a decision was made and right now I'm both leaving town and staying here. I'm ok with all this. But until I know the answer, I don't know how to behave.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: limbo; schrodingers-cat

LCD Soundsystem Is Playing At My House

2007-03-26T20:52:00.000+10:00

James Murphy is cooler than you (yes, Danelle, even you). He lives in Brooklyn. He has produced some of the most hipster-friendly tracks of the last ten years. His friends are cooler than your friends. His record collection is cooler than any record collection you have even seen. He writes ironic songs about how cool he is. He is that cool.

So it's easy to dismiss his own "band" LCD Soundsystem as a hipster vanity project. Just one guy making little in-jokes about how cool he is. About how he likes Can but doesn't take it too seriously.

But you'd be wrong to do that. Because the new album Sound of Silver is amazing. The first couple of tracks are dancefloor stormers, sporting some great falsetto work from Murphy and some killer beats. Then there are the emotional epics "Someone Great" and "All My Friends" - beautiful cigarette-lighter-wavers for indie kids. Then three ironic, funky tracks and a showtune finale in the form of "New York I Love You".

Murphy is taking the piss most of the time, but not all of the time. In the end, he's just a thirtysomething dude making records that sound like the ones he listens to when he's home on his own. And there's no shame in that.

Categories: Indie
Tags: lcd-soundsystem; too-cool-for-you

Sooner or later, everyone passes through this town

2007-03-21T18:30:00.000+11:00

Tonight I ended up stopping by a supermarket on the other side of town to me - not my normal haunt by any means - and when I was walking down the toiletries aisle, I saw this girl who looked familiar.

And it hit me that it was this girl Caroline who was in my class in Year 8 and 9 at a high school half a country away. And I knew it was her immediately, because while I've grown nearly a foot and started wearing glasses, she looked exactly the way I remember her. Or not exactly, more in the way that people from your teenage years age in your memory to keep pace with you, so somehow they're simultaneously 14 forever but also 25.

I didn't say anything, because what can you say? Do you strike up a conversation based on a acquaintance from over a decade ago? Do you mention mutual friends who you know even less about what they're doing now than the girl you're talking to? Do you bring up the stupid schoolyard taunts you were both subjected to? Do you try and work out what kind of person she's become in the intervening years?

So I kept walking and got my groceries wondering whether she was thinking exactly the same thing. And wondering just how it is that you try so hard to keep some things in your life and other things just recur by chance.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: recurring-characters; teenage-flashbacks

Australian country towns

2007-03-19T18:38:00.000+11:00

When I was a kid, my parents would play this song that had a chorus about thanking God for Australian country towns. And my parents would feel that way for the most part - they've voluntarily lived in enough of the places! Me on the other hand - well most people find it hard to believe that I've ever lived anywhere smaller than Canberra.

I've got a love-hate relationship with small towns, I suppose. Nothing too unusual about that. A lot of my best friends have been from similar backgrounds and most of us choose to live in larger towns. Knowing everyone is great, but not connecting very well with those people you know - not so great.

Just this weekend I've had a road-trip out to visit my parents in Echuca-Moama - an eight hour drive across the flat Riverina plain. You get to see a lot of small, and some less small, towns. Including that hallmark of the country: Target's rural cousin.
On my drive back today, I stopped off an old-fashioned tea-room in Lockhart, about half an hour out of Wagga Wagga, and as well as feeling like I was stepping into a time-warp, I felt like I shouldn't have been there without a letter of introduction from my grandmother!

Occasionally I muse about moving back to the country, but I'm kidding myself. I'd die in a couple of weeks. But maybe, just maybe, as I get older I might change. And maybe I'll retire to the bush, hopefully somewhere with a Target Country.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: australian-country-towns; target-country

Bridal bingo: part 2

2007-03-11T08:36:00.000+11:00

Went to a lovely wedding yesterday for some friends of mine. It was a great opportunity to catch up with some people I hadn't spoken to in ages and generally a fun day.

Of course, it wouldn't have been a wedding without a game of Bridal Bingo - and I have to say this one scored quite highly.

We had Pachelbel's Canon, 1 Corinthians 13 ("love is patient...") AND shiny bridesmaid's dresses (the colour of Turkish Delight wrappers).

Truly a special occasion.

Categories: Ladies; Miscellaneous
Tags: bingo; all-my-friends-are-getting-married; turkish-delight

Time to spare

2007-03-10T08:30:00.000+11:00

I was in Sydney for a meeting on Thursday (in town for a whole three hours) and while in an airport bathroom I stumbled across an ad for one of those executive dating services. You know - the kind where they talk about "Who has time to meet people?'

Now I know meeting people becomes harder as you get older. Thirtysomethings can't just walk up to someone in the playground and offer to share their lunch. But I do think this says a lot about our culture at the moment.

Recent studies have suggested that Australians are working some of the longest hours in the world. I'm guessing if you don't meet your soulmate in your workplace, then there aren't a lot of other opportunities.

But even with the convenience of a dating service, how the hell are you supposed to sustain a meaningful relationship if you have no time? I picture a lot of stressed-out executives meeting over lunch, hooking up out of desperation and two weeks later are only seeing each other as they wordlessly climb into bed and fall asleep.

These kind of 'solutions' don't seem very effective to me.

Categories: Ladies
Tags: society; dating; time-management

Reasons to stop shopping at Threadless.com

2007-03-07T22:47:00.000+11:00

#1 They had Zach Braff modelling one of their new shirts.
#2 Some dude in Civic the other day was wearing The Scr-emo, which is my pride and joy.

These are both cancelled out by how awesome my new Procrastinators: Leaders of Tomorrow shirt is.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: t-shirts; zach-braff; procrastinators

No good advice

2007-03-06T17:48:00.000+11:00

One of the stranger developments in recent history has been my shift at work into a people manager of sorts. At the ripe old age of 25, I've been supervising the young 'uns, but also giving tips and guidance to people a decade or more older.

Curious, no?

The stranger thing is that my advice is sometimes helpful and appreciated.

I guess I spent a lot of my life thinking I had nothing to offer, so I wouldn't trust my instincts and open my mouth. Turns out my instincts are actually pretty good - and getting a lot better over time by putting things into practice.

Just another example of where poor self-confidence can be self-perpetuating.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: advice; management; confidence

Priorities

2007-03-03T09:20:00.000+11:00

I died laughing yesterday reading Bill Maher's piece in Salon about Christian opposition to the HPV vaccine on the grounds that it will encourage kids to start having sex. Maher's critique is solid gold:

People don't get the vaccine for typhoid and say, "Great, now I can drink the sewer water in Bombay." It's like saying if you give a kid a tetanus shot she'll want to jab rusty nails in her feet. It's like being against a cure for blindness because it'll encourage masturbation.

And here's the kicker:

These Christian groups aren't just against the HPV shot; they're against family planning and condoms and morning after pills -- they want to make sure sex is as dangerous as possible, so that kids know, if they sleep around and get an STD, that's God teaching them a lesson.

I read a lot of lefty publications online and a recurring them is that a lot of social liberals think that Christians only care about foetuses. If you're actually post-birth, then you can go to Hell.

Now I've read the Bible a few times. And there aren't a lot of references to foetuses, or pre-marital sex, or anything like that. Yet a lot of people act like these issues are the sole determinant of whether a society is going to the dogs or not.

I feel that a re-prioritisation is urgently in order.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: hpv-vaccine; conservatives; priorities

We're having freaky weather, there's a lot of it about

2007-03-01T07:08:00.000+11:00

Maybe it's global warming, maybe it's the end of the El Niño. But something is really strange about our weather lately.

We had a massive thunderstorm on Tuesday night - my house sounded like it was coming apart at the seams. And when I left the house in the morning, most of the trees have been ripped half-bare of their foliage.

None of that prepared me for the sights to be found closer to the CBD where hailstones had piled up in such quantities there was still a foot-deep covering of ice of some roads and footpaths.

I didn't take my camera, but here's one of the photos that are doing the rounds.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: hail-damage; ice-in-february

Camera Obscura and my new favourite band

2007-02-26T18:36:00.000+11:00

Excellent times on Friday night going to see those lovely Scots Camera Obscura play. Tracyanne Campbell's voice was suffering a bit from a cold, but the band did admirably. So down to earth too - she managed to pick out a guy in the front row as having formerly worked at Oxfam. Nuts.

No love, unfortunately, for the rockabilly looking guy who insisted on busting some impressive but space-consuming dance moves in a really packed venue. He should just stood around and stroked his chin like the rest of us.

Photo of Ms Campbell here. And she's tinier than I'd expected.

My big discovery of the night was an awesome Perth band called Institut Polaire. I unfairly dismissed them as Architecture in Helsinki rip-offs when I noticed they had a trumpeter and a violinist. But they were superb. You can hear some of their jangly, arty pop music at their myspace - and I hear an album will be released this year. Their 7" "City Walls And Empires" is doing the rounds on my turntable at the moment. And the covered "In The Aeroplane Over The Sea". Good times.

Categories: Indie
Tags: camera-obscura; institut-polaire; cuteness-overload

Going out on a high note

2007-02-18T23:00:00.000+11:00

If last year had any particular highlight, it was probably establishing myself as a serious writer - churning out material regularly that people actually read, rather than just talking myself up.

So it's strange to say goodbye to my first ever regular writing gig - the stypod at Stylus Magazine. After 50 articles and a lot of words, I've decided the time has come to move on and try something different.

My last article, a look back at the underrated Tripping Daisy seems to have been well received. And that's how I'm glad to leave it.

Thanks to Stylus for the year that has been.

Categories: Indie
Tags: tripping-daisy; stylus-magazine; 50-articles-later

Valentine's Day

2007-02-13T21:46:00.000+11:00

So it's V Day tomorrow and like 24 other V Days to date, I'm solo. I'm not sure it's ever bothered me before...after all, if you're single 364 days a year, that single day only makes so much more difference...and it doesn't really this year.

I know I'm a pretty cynical guy and for the most part it's not an act. But I just can't seem to summon up the level of angst and bile a lot of single people manage to have towards this holiday. Sure it's shmaltzy, sure it's commercial. But at it's base, it stands for something I still want to believe in.

I've never been in love. I don't know if I ever will be. But it's beautiful to look around and see that there are people everywhere I look meeting, falling for each other, going out, fighting like hell and somehow making it all work out. I'd be a real shit to want to deny any of them that right.

So I want to celebrate a day that is all about love. I want there to be at least one 24-hour period when people can forget all the bad and remember that there are people who love them and that they love.

If you're in a couple, lap it up. Because tomorrow is your day.

Categories: Ladies
Tags: valentines-day; public-service-announcement

PS. Don't think this is the start of a newer, happier Aropax Nation. It'll be back to doom and gloom shortly.

Internet dreams

2007-02-12T21:06:00.000+11:00

For someone who reads as much as I do, it's pretty much always book review time. My most recent reading was Israeli academic Aaron Ben-Ze'ev's Love Online, a look at how the internet is re-shaping relationships and emotions.

It was a good read - not too academic, but well-researched. It focused a lot on cyber-sex and adultery, which weren't really what I wanted from the book, but were interesting nonetheless. The bits that fascinated me were how internet relationships can substitute for real-life relationships, and the impacts (positive and negative) that this can have. The book got me thinking a lot about how I use the internet and what kind of things I'm looking for from it - especially communication with people with similar interests etc.

And it really made me want to go out and have cybersex with a fifty-year-old man posing as a 19 year old lesbian. It really did.

Categories: Books; Ladies
Tags: love-online; internet-relationships; creepy-old-men

JT on the job

2007-02-08T18:04:00.000+11:00

I don't know about you, but I always liked Justin Timberlake. Not the crappy 'NSync days, just the solo stuff. "Like I Love You" was one of my favourite songs of 2003. I told people this. They laughed.

So now, hipsters? What have you got to say for yourselves?

The New York Times just ran an article talking about how the little guy is getting some cred in unlikely places. And I mean unlikely - take a look at this quote:

“Believe it or not, Justin Timberlake has some major fans in the anarchist punk community.”

The boy has made it.

Categories: Indie
Tags: justin-timberlake; anarchist-punk-fans; hipsters

Band of the moment: Hammock

2007-02-05T21:37:00.001+11:00

I though it was cool enough when Tim Hughes, Christian worship leader pin-up boy, talked up Sigur Ros at a conference I was at. Now I discover the guy who wrote "God of Wonders" pretty much is Sigur Ros. Seriously - turns out that the Marc Byrd who penned that MOR worship perennial is one of the members of Hammock - my new favourite shoegazey, dreamy ambient pop group.

Thanks to the good folks at Bitchfork and Popmatters, I discovered these guys - two American dudes, a cellist who used to be in Sixpence None The Richer and a girl who sings.

Their latest album (their second) is just stunning. Layers of atmospheric keyboards, chiming guitars, minimal but heavenly vocals. It's even better than last year's effort by Gregor Samsa - interestingly enough another group of Christians operating under the radar.

It gets me excited when musicians realise that you can communicate better by showing what God is like, rather than just describing.

Categories: Gospel; Indie
Tags: hammock; marc-byrd; ambient; godlike-genius

Hot for preacher

2007-02-05T19:46:00.000+11:00

I'm intrigued, I've gotta say.

Back in my day, preachers were all old and conservative and so on. But now there's a new breed who...well...like Van Halen. What gives?

First it was Mark Driscoll from Mars Hill who told of his love for Diamond Dave (but not Sammy Hagar, apparently).

Now it's Dan Kimball at Vintage Faith who is all excited about the forthcoming reunion (with David Lee Roth).

They should never have let Generation Xers lead churches.

Categories: Gospel; Indie
Tags: van-halen; mark-driscoll; dan-kimball; diamond-dave

Diplo-macy

2007-02-05T19:18:00.000+11:00

Quite a night out for this little blogger on Friday when my current favourite DJ, Diplo, hit Canberra. I'd been listening quite a lot to his Fabriclive mix (#24 if you're interested) and loved the way he managed to fuse Dirty South hip-hop, Brazilian Baile Funk and indie rock all in one seamless groove.

The guy sure didn't disappoint. He gave us Hot Chip, Outkast, M.I.A. and curiously enough Justin Timberlake and AC/DC. I have never danced so crazily in my life.

If you get a chance to catch the guy spinning, he is a maniac and you owe it to your dancing feet. My "gay shoes", as Sarah calls them, got quite a work-out.

Categories: Indie; Hip-Hop
Tags: diplo; dj-sets; in-canberra; dancing-shoes

Linkblogging

2007-01-31T21:20:00.000+11:00

The other day Andy and I were talking about blogging, particularly on the "emerging church" scene and how a lot of A-listers, I guess you'd call them, actually don't write any original content. They just link to other bloggers and make a few comments themselves.

Two things going on there, I think.

One - nothing raises your blog rankings like posting about the thing everyone else is talking about. Go too far off the beaten path and you won't get turned up in those technorati searches for "Ted Haggard + meth + rentboy" and you won't get linked by all your other buddies who are stuck on the topic du jour. And linking to other people gets you their attention enough for them to link you back.

Two - it's tough at the top to keep coming up with topics. Not that I know what it's like at the top, but I just figure it must be. You have thousands read your site daily and suddenly you have to post something to keep things moving along. Easy solution - just post links to ten articles by bloggers with more time to think up good ideas.

It's not all bad - after all, sometimes these big blogs can be your one-stop-shop for what's going on in the EC world. But it's no substitute for some actual ideas.

Anyway, I'm cleaning out my RSS feeds and swapping some big names for some lesser-known but consistently thought-provoking talents.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: blogosphere; emerging; laziness

You are the generation that bought more shoes and you get what you deserve

2007-01-31T21:05:00.000+11:00

As some of you know, I love sneakers. If they weren't kinda expensive, I would buy cool sneakers all the time.

Fortunately in Singapore they're slightly cheaper. So when I saw these babies in a shop that was playing Nouvelle Vague's cover of "Ever Fallen In Love?", I knew what I had to do.

That's actually all I have to say on the topic.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: cool-shoes; vans-with-palms-and-stuff

More holiday photos

2007-01-29T21:37:00.000+11:00

I took heaps of photos on my holiday. So what?

I like bridges. This was a fancy Bidayuh (a Borneo tribe) replica. Trippy.

Me on Santubong Peninsula, Sarawk. Looking like I take myself pretty seriously. Which is funny given I'm wearing a park entry sticker.

The beach at Santubong. Pretty, no?

Didn't see any orangutans in Sarawk, but I did see a macacque. If it's not a macacque, then I'm happy to be correct by an zoologist readers.

Matt looking quite the field researcher. Jane Goodall wants her camera back.

Jungle apartments.

It's blurry, but I like this think it works in a Wong Kar-Wai kind of style.

Well that's enough to be getting on with.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: holiday-photos; they-keep-coming

Call me a sellout. Or better yet, just call me.

2007-01-29T19:39:00.000+11:00

It's cool for mid-20s urban cool try-hards (as one of my colleagues calls me -- charming) to pay out on the Baby Boomers still clinging to their 60s nostalgia and "phoney Beatlemania".

But I'm not any better, given that I just shelled out for a Foo Fighters live album because it has acoustic songs I loved in my mid-teens. They haven't written a song as good as "Everlong" in a decade, but I'm willing to pay good money to hear an MORish acoustic version.

Ah, whatever. My fond memories of the 90s will keep me warm.

Categories: Indie
Tags: foo-fighters; sell-out; big-time

Australia Day blogger style

2007-01-28T21:36:00.000+11:00

As well as listening to the Hottest 100 countdown, my Australia Day involved some quality time with the lovely Andy and Emma P at their Sydney pad.

There was good conversation, excellent lamb salad, lots of wine and Chicken McNuggets. And some crazy hi-jinks (Joel Osteen, check your email).

Just how you want to spend a lazy public holiday.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: good-friends; australia-day; joel-osteen-check-your-email

JJJ: A Tribute

2007-01-28T15:58:00.000+11:00

It wouldn't have been Australia Day on Friday without the annual Triple J Hottest 100 countdown, it really wouldn't.

Ever since I was fifteen, I've been tuning in by myself, with friends or at a party to hear what the voters have picked as the songs of the year.

I don't always agree with the taste of the average JJJ listener, it's true. I typically get one song out of ten votes actually make it into the countdown (Gotye's "Hearts A Mess" at #8 this year) and the popularity of Aussie hip hop and low-grade emo can be a bit of a strain. But I always support it because it represents something fantastic.

Triple J is a pretty unique station in that very few countries have a quality nation-wide broadcaster focused on playing left-field music for the young and slightly-less-young. For anyone who's come of age in the last fifteen years, particularly in a regional area, it's hard to overestimate the importance of JJJ in skewing your musical tastes towards the "alternative".

As friend and fellow blogger Andy says, you walk into some hick town in the middle of nowhere only to discover that all the kids are into Architecture in Helsinki.

In a world before the internet, there was nothing quite like it. Even now it's still ensuring that Aussie kids outside of the major cities are given a chance to hear music that hasn't been pre-packaged and market-researched into banality.

To the visionaries that took a dodgy Sydney radio station national all those years ago, I salute you.

Categories: Indie
Tags: hottest-100; triple-j; bringing-music-to-the-kids

Messages in bottles

2007-01-23T21:43:00.000+11:00

You know who were really cool? The Police. They had some awesome songs. Even Sting acknowledges that.

You know what's also cool? Bands that are influenced by the Police. That's cool too.

Which explains why I've been listening to so much Mute Math lately. Seriously kids, these guys make atmospheric, arty rock music exactly of the kind Mr Sumner (or Sting to his friends) would make if he hadn't gone shit about twenty years ago.

That's all I have to say to you.

Categories: Indie
Tags: mute-math; gordon-sumner; the-police

Preaching and the self

2007-01-21T21:44:00.000+11:00

I wanted to do a light-hearted post at some point about the uniform we assume when we preach - the way that pastors and speakers are usually a few notches more dressy than the congregation in mainstream churches (see right).

But after the sermon I gave last Sunday, it seemed irrelevant and a bit facile. So here are some reflections that are a bit more insightful. Fingers crossed.

A week ago tonight, I gave my third sermon ever at a Sunday evening service. It was on the topic of Abraham as a prayer warrior.

"Prayer warrior" says my internal voice "what a wank! Surely there's nothing particularly deep there for me to communicate?"

I spent my holidays turning up a blank on what to say and it was only on my return that the idea of prayer as a way of getting to know God's character hit home.

And it was only an hour before the service that the final piece fell into place. The idea that we can never be the "prayer warrior" because we believe we're not special enough (or too flawed) for God to listen. How we believe half truths like "God loves us, but He doesn't really like us", or "God forgives sin, but it still affects how He sees us".

It went down pretty well, by all reports. Lots of people told me how it affected them and they were able to be specific about what they got out of it - so they must at least have listened!

But here's the thing - it wasn't my message. I know the aim of preaching is to get to a place where God speaks rather than we speak, but this was something more.

It wasn't my message because I didn't believe it. As I spoke I was saying something that I want more than anything else to be true, but I can't accept it. I don't believe that my prayers will ever have any impact or that I have any right to ask for anything.

This brain-spirit disconnect is profoundly disorienting and I hear that it's not uncommon for preachers. It makes you feel amazed that you can be used in spite of your lack of faith, but also disturbed. I mean, why me? Why choose someone to deliver a message when that person lacks even the most basic character traits needed?

I read an article around the time of the Ted Haggard debacle along these lines. And it seems pretty destructive. Because if you know you can be used when your life is in disarray, then why strive for anything better? If you can communicate something so profoundly without it changing your own heart, then is it all bullshit? Has anyone whose message has moved you believed a word they say?

Is it all just a different suit we put on over the casual dress of weakness and disbelief?

Categories: Gospel
Tags: unbelief; cynicism; casual-dress

Ch-ch-changes

2007-01-21T21:20:00.000+11:00

It shouldn't have been a shock to come back from holidays only to find that 2007 is starting off a lot like a repeat episode of 2006 - it is the non-ratings season after all! But the let-down has been pretty brutal. My natural pessimism tells me that this year will have all the bad components of previous years and none of the good.

So, I'll take this opportunity to do a little perspective check. Because you can never have too much perspective.

For a start, we have a new youth pastor at our church. I'm not a young adults leader any more, and no longer an intern, but I hear good things about this guy and it will be interesting to see how he makes his mark on the place.

Secondly, it's around that time of year when new people come to town to refresh a population depleted by constant departures. Who knows what new friends might be in that bunch?

Lastly, my life isn't static. I can take some responsibility and make decisions that will make things easier for me.

So here we go.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: moving-on; new-years; changing-of-the-guards

Gig mayhem

2007-01-20T11:03:00.000+11:00

It seems like it's been ages since I went out to see a band - if I checked, it was probably back in September. Which is a while, ok?

All will be remedied soon enough. I'm planning on seeing Camera Obscura in Melbourne in late February. That should be lovely, given that their album was my favourite of the year, although I have heard some rumours that they aren't exactly charismatic performers. We'll see.

I will also be going to the V Festival in Sydney come March - headlined by no less than the re-formed Pixies and also featuring Phoenix, Gnarls Barkley and 2manydjs. I haven't been to a festival in over four years, so it will be an experience if nothing else. And it shouldn't be nothing else.

So promoters of Australia, keep the acts coming and I'll keep paying for your kids' education.

Categories: Indie
Tags: live-music; v-festival; pixies-in-the-flesh

Photoblog extravaganza

2007-01-17T19:52:00.000+11:00

Oh, so I swore I wouldn't become a photo blog, but it's not every day you go to Malaysia and take a few hundred shots you're proud of.

So suck on it.

Some photos in and around Melaka. Which was beautiful, obviously.

And some more from Penang. Which is spectacularly random.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: holiday-photos

My favourite music videos of 2006

2007-01-17T18:38:00.000+11:00

In the year that YouTube changed the way we view videos, I thought it would be appropriate to give a brief summary of the clips that got into my affections. I hope you like them too.

#5 Hot Chip - Over and Over

These guys didn't really grab me with their Devo-ish shtick until I saw this. It's a technicolor geek disco. It's sort of how you'd imagine sex with a Linux programmer.

#4 Starflyer 59 - I Win

Not my favourite song of the last album, but a great little stomping pop number. Inexplicably a couple of actors play the band. Maybe Jason Martin and Co. are just shy. Anyway, the guy playing him has loads of world-weary attitude. It's a simple concept that pays off.

#3 Marit Larsen - Under The Surface

I think it's Marit herself I love almost as much as her music. Which probably explains why this simple clip works for me. It captures the emotion of the song beautifully, complete with the dramatic string section.

#2 Gnarls Barkley - Smiley Faces

This quirky mockumentary around the truth of Gnarls Barkley is beautifully reminiscent of Ken Burns'Jazz films. It's so straight faced and so adorable.

#1 The Boy Least Likely To - Be Gentle With Me

The twee-est song ever gets the full twee treatment. A marionnette Jof Owen worries about his own frailty while little marionnette animals dance around. It would be sickening if it weren't so heartfelt.

Categories: Indie
Tags: you-tube-rocks; year-end-lists

Can anyone spell e-x-p-l-o-i-t-a-t-i-o-n?

2007-01-16T18:03:00.000+11:00

I don't like to weigh in on things like this very often, but this got me.

I was in a shop yesterday buying myself some of the excellent Talking Heads remasters when what do I see staring me in the face but Bindi Kid Fitness.

Now there's been a lot of talk about the pimping out and general commodification of young Bindi Irwin and I'll just come out and agree with what's being said. It's a disgrace.

If you look at the history of child stars over the decades it's not exactly a recipe for producing well-adjusted adults now is it? And little Bindi is being pushed harder than Macaulay Culkin ever was.

Her manager takes the line that Bindi only does these things because she loves them. Well shit, then let her. After all who would deny a small child exactly what they want irrespective of the future consequences? That would just be unfair!

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: bindi-irwin; child-labour-laws

State of the blogger address

2007-01-14T00:31:00.000+11:00

I don't know if I told you, but at least part of the reason behind my last holiday was to get my head together and work out where to in 2007. I'm not sure it worked, but I have some thoughts on what I want and don't want in the coming year.

For me, 2006 was a lot about keeping busy. There were a lot of personal and social changes over the previous summer and it was easy to just take on stuff as a way of filling time and keeping my mind off the things that I wanted it off.

So I got myself two regular writing gigs, maintained my blog regularly, led a weekly church small group, took two theological college subjects, planned a church plant, preached on several occasions at church and elsewhere, got promoted at work, travelled interstate frequently on work trips and heaven knows what else.

I was stressed out for a lot of the year, but I was generally able to avoid the big questions about my life. The moments when I had to take a hard look at myself were brief and fleeting.

I think what I've come to is a realisation that the stuff isn't going to make me complete and happy and in line with God's plan any more than complete hedonism would. But what is?

With any luck, 2007 might be the year of working that out.

I don't plan to drop many of the things that have kept me busy, but I will need to make some adjustments. Mainly so I can have the quiet time to work on the things that need work and the time to focus to the relationships and people that matter.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music; Gospel
Tags: state-of-the-union; busy-and-tired; where-to-now

Three years in solitary

2007-01-10T18:02:00.000+11:00

On my holiday I talked a lot with Matt about the problem of 'roots' and finding a community or family of your own. It's funny when you realise how your upbringing has shaped you and your siblings in a similar way. In our ways, each of us is quite independent and footloose. We're all willing to up and move and leave connections behind if we can see a good reason. Not surprising given our nomadic existence throughout the 80s and early 90s.

So here's the thing - I feel a need for connections and roots and stability and I don't think I can get them. For a few months there I speculated that life elsewhere would solve all my problems, but it was just delusion. I was no more connected back in Melbourne and I was a fool to think that a second-try would turn up anything different. Community and family aren't easy to come by.

Is my desire wrong then? Or even just unrealistic?

I know God made us to live in community, but maybe that doesn't translate to a close network of friends and family living in close proximity and spending heaps of time together. Maybe it's just a vague, nebulous idea like the 'fellowship of man'.

This leaves me with two possibilities - keep trying and work out what it is about me that makes me find connections difficult to gain or just give up. Succumb to my nomadic instincts and take encouragement and friendship wherever I can get it as it appears, like manna in the wilderness.

Ah, whatever. I'm just not sure what's right and what's achievable. I really just don't know.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: connections; community; nomadic-existence

Holiday photo mayhem

2007-01-08T23:02:00.000+11:00

Well, if you want to know what I got up to on my holiday, then stroll on by my flickr account and check out the small selection of photos I've got already. I'll probably post some more here (I've got hundreds) as the mood takes me. And as I run out of things to say.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: holiday-photos; easy-way-out

Borrowed time

2007-01-06T23:16:00.000+11:00

Well folks, I'm back from my holiday and its a new year. In a way, this post might not have even happened if I'd had computer access at the moment a few weeks ago when I decided with utter certainty that I should just delete the damn blog and get on with my life.

But I didn't and we'll see whether that was the right decision. I guess I'm not sure anymore why I write this blog and there were some unpleasant experiences in the latter months of 2006 which made me think it would be easier to pack it in.

So this blog is officially on borrowed time - sitting here waiting for the flash of inspiration needed to carry me over into another year of ill-judged ramblings. Thanks to the lovely people who read this blog and share their thoughts with me - you've been great and if I do keep doing this, it will be mostly due to you.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: blogging; quitting; times-up-suckas

Let's get out of this country

2006-12-08T14:58:00.000+11:00

Aropax® Nation will be on hiatus for the next few weeks while I'm taking it easy on my holidays. I never understand those people who create blogs especially for their holidays...who has time for blogging when they're somewhere new and exciting?

So have fun while I'm away and keep it real, kids.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: holidays; leaving-on-a-jet-plane

Thoughts for Thursday

2006-12-07T09:02:00.000+11:00

I listened to a track off the new My Chemical Romance on the way in to work today and I thought I'd put on Use Yor Illusion I by accident.

Categories: Indie
Tags: welcome-to-the-black-parade; its-hard-to-hold-a-candle

Best albums of 2006 - Part 2

2006-12-05T14:45:00.000+11:00

Time for the next entry in my Top 20 of 2006...

#10 The Pipettes - We Are The Pipettes

Pastiche gets a bad rap in critical circles and its often justified. There really is no substitute for an innovative approach and quality that stands alone apart from any gimmicks. Good for the Pipettes, since their polka-dotted, synchronised-dancing shtick is just one of their good points. The three Pips and their boy backing band have got great tunes (try shifting 'Pull Shapes' or 'Your Kisses Are Wasted On Me' from your head) and truckloads of attitude. They're sassy, witty and engaging. And you'd need to break both your legs to avoid dancing.

#9 Destroyer - Destroyer's Rubies

Another self-mythologising, thrilling effort from Vancouver's perverse poet, Dan Bejar. Putting aside the cheesy, all-MIDI sounds of 2004's Your Blues but not its outrageous, convoluted storytelling, Bejar has given us a rollicking album of classic rock tunes and psychedelic freak-outs. The Bowie comparisons that have plagued Destroyer since day one seem increasingly irrelevant now that Bejar has established himself as a totally idiosyncratic performer. Here he cannibalises his own back-catalogue, pillages 40 years of rock history and earns himself his own drinking game. Try topping that, Thin White Duke.

#8 Marit Larsen - Under The Surface

Formerly half of Norwegian girl-pop duo M2M, Marit Larsen has turned her back on mediocrity – hopefully for good. This album was a completely left-field surprise for me and doesn’t seem to have captured much critical or popular attention. That's a crying shame, because there's a lot to love on this album. It's wilfully eclectic (mixing pop, indie rock and bluegrass with abandon), shamelessly catchy and utterly unique. Larsen's own personality shines through every song, investing them with heart and guts and magic. We're watching a future music sensation in mid-bloom.

#7 Gotye - Like Drawing Blood

Wally De Backer's cut 'n' paste opus has a little something for everyone. Formed from hundreds of budget-vinyl samples and De Backer's own gutsy vocals, Blood runs the gamut of blue-eyed soul, dubby trip-hop, grinding funk and old-school breaks. It all sounds so familiar and so new at the same time. You struggle to believe that this album hasn't been around your entire life.

#6 Casiotone For The Painfully Alone - Etiquette

Taking the same template as his previous Casiotone albums – cheap synthesizers, gruff vocals, urban angst – Owen Ashworth adds some thematic consistency to the mix. Families (absent, dysfunctional, disapproving) feature heavily in these musical vignettes of mid-twenties loneliness and hurt. Each track has the simple grace of haiku and the lo-fi melodies to embed them deep in your ear. These stories are heartbreaking, funny and very, very human.

#5 Phoenix - It's Never Been Like That

While sporting some of the best pop singles in recent history, these French 80s revivalists' first two albums didn't quite have the evenness to be great LPs. Phoenix seem to have finally cracked the code, because It's Never Been Like That is a short, sharp pop treasure. There's no fluff, no frills. Just tune after tune of terrific pop-rock with loads of Gallic attitude. Imagine the first Strokes album with slicker production and a heavy Wham! influence and you might be close.

#4 Band Of Horses - Everything All The Time

These Seattle folk-rockers have had to work hard to overcome the perception that they're cheap rip-offs of the Shins or My Morning Jacket. They've ultimately triumphed on the strength of the ten tracks on offer here. The consistency of quality puts you in mind of Neil Young or Creedence Clearwater Revival at their peak. And just as those guys were Canadian and Californian hippies playing the music of the Heartland, these Grunge Staters inject their own indie sensibility into bluesy, flannel-shirted rock. The result is a thrilling road trip through Band of Horses' alternative Americana.

#3 Bluebottle Kiss - Doubt Seeds

After more than a decade as stalwarts of the Australian rock scene, Bluebottle Kiss made the brave decision to put out a double album – a summation of all their influences over two CDs. The gamble has paid off, although it’s a challenging listen. The energy of BBK's live shows can be heard as the band hurtle their way through their own stew of the Stooges, Sonic Youth, Afghan Whigs, Neil Young, Midnight Oil and Miles Davis. Jamie Hutchings is as compelling as ever, howling out his frustration and astonishment at the world around him. Few albums are ever this ambitious – even fewer pull it off.

#2 Thursday - A City By The Light Divided

The pin-up boys of 'screamo' have taken on a big challenge with their latest long player – a monumental rock record that would cover themes of urban decay, war, social fragmentation, love and loss. They're equal to the challenge and this is likely to be their masterpiece. Producer Dave Fridmann continues his project of revitalising veteran bands, giving the album an amazing sheen and intensity. The wall-of-sound is almost unrelenting, hammering away at your consciousness until you are powerless to resist. If you can be unmoved by the soft-loud beauty of the flawless second side, you are made of strong stuff.

#1 Camera Obscura - Let's Get Out Of The Country

Scotland's other twee pop band get out of their country (to Sweden) and make a joyous, bittersweet kiss of a record. Tracyanne Campbell, now on sole vocal duties, sings her heart out over some of the best jangly pop music ever committed to tape. Jari Haapalainen's string-soaked production recalls every great Phil Spector record ever made. Yet it's Campbell's performance that is the show-stopper here. Her lyrics are clever and wry without being precious and her vocals are quirky, off-beat and affecting. Every song is laced with a combination of regret, caution and resignation, even in the midst of happiness. These are complex emotions to convey, by Campbell does it effortlessly. Finally – a pop record for grown-ups.

Categories: Indie
Tags: best-of-lists; albums-2006

Best albums of 2006 - Part 1

2006-12-04T20:18:00.000+11:00

It's that time of year again, when the typical music-buff's obsessive need to categorise, collate and compare is overpowering. And so we come to Aropax® Nation's second annual best albums list. It's bigger than last year (20 instead of the oh-so-done-already Top 10), it's ordered backwards (to tease you into a foam of anticipation) and it might even be better. Let's see if a year of regular music writing has done me any good!

The usual disclaimers apply about personal taste and the limits a full-time job places on my ability to hear everything ever released. But bear in mind I have tried – and have even struggled to keep myself to only 20. So apologies to Sonic Youth, Mastodon, My Morning Jacket, the Radio Dept and Xiu Xiu – you will be denied acclaim by a seventh-tier blogger, at least this year.

So, into the first instalment…

#20 Beth Orton – The Comfort of Strangers

After flirtations with dance and pop music, everyone's favourite off-beat folkie returns with her definitive statement to date. Producer Jim O'Rourke gives Orton's greatest asset – her voice, natch – room to expand, managing to uncover even more nuances in one of modern music's most distinct sets of pipes. The sheer force of personality behind Strangers is refreshing in an increasingly faceless industry. Orton can be scathing ('Worms') or tender ('Safe In Your Arms') but she's never less than compelling.

#19 Brand New – The Devil And God Are Raging Inside Me

Long Island's most sensitive punks had a lot to live up to with their third album. Whether they will meet the expectations of the bloggers and critics who loved Deja Entendu and pored over the leaked demos is largely irrelevant – quite simply because they've made an outstanding album on their own terms. The songs and arrangements are complex; subverting expectations with gleefully off-kilter passages only to subvert them all over again with an irresistible pop hook. The Devil and God agree – this is quite a record.

#18 Asobi Seksu – Citrus

Sounding like a melange of Sonic Youth, My Bloody Valentine and the Cardigans, NYC hipsters Asobi Seksu attracted some attention with their self-titled album from a few years ago. For all its dizzying moments of anthemic, noisy pop, it had nothing on the coherence and precision of Citrus. The band's sound has settled, no longer chasing after individual sounds and influences but synthesizing them all into a hazy, wall-of-sound that plays through every song. And in pursuing consistency, the band has retained their debut's quality songwriting, feedback-blast climaxes and sheer joy of playing rock music.

#17 Damien Jurado – And Now That I'm In Your Shadow

Time hasn't tempered Damien Jurado's despair or cynicism – he seems to get more dour and troubled with each album. After a decade of creating literate, slice-of-life folk a la Springsteen's Nebraska album, Jurado has perfected his sound. The usual cast of heartbroken liars and losers are all present and correct – and Jurado's quavering tenor can convey sadness like no other. It's not a happy listen by any means, but it's a stirring one.

#16 Tamas Wells – A Plea En Vendredi

Twee was definitely not a dirty word in 2006, with strong albums by some established players as well as some new kids on the block. Melburnian Tamas Wells and his regular band of talented musos put out another unassuming gem, almost completely under the radar. Over a lilting, acoustic background, Wells sings sweetly about everyday people and the little injustices and ironies that about. It's a gift and a pleasure that unfortunately few people will receive.

#15 Underoath – Define The Great Line

By crossbreeding metalcore with the melodic swoon of emo, an ever-multiplying number of bands have turned a fringe genre into a formidable element in modern rock. As one of the scene's acknowledged leaders, Underoath had the hopes of black-clad teenagers everywhere riding on their latest LP. Lucky for the kids and the rest of us, this album is as ferocious as it is sonically intriguing. By injecting a whole lot more death metal grunt into their trademark screamo sound, Underoath have made an album with astonishing variety and a lot of power.

#14 M. Craft – Silver and Fire

Formerly of Aussie shoegazers Sidewinder, Martin Craft was an unlikely candidate for summery pop album of the year – but he's come close with this little effort. Fusing the world-weary Euro-chic of Serge Gainsbourg, the countrified sway of early Neil Young and the sweet narcosis of the Velvet Underground, Craft spins tales of love, disaffection and hipster life. And he does it well. Blissful tunes like 'You Are The Music' and 'Lucile' should be the soundtrack for high-school discos everywhere. They are in my imagination, anyway.

#13 Gregor Samsa – 55:12

One of the slowest albums of the year came from a group of youngsters clearly in the thrall of post-rock greats Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Rachels and Mogwai. Of course, mere slowness can lead to mere mediocrity at snail’s pace. Gregor Samsa keep it interesting with gorgeous vocals, carefully timed explosions of sound and the irresistible blending of childlike wonder and adult resignation. This is less than an hour of music that feels like a lifetime’s worth.

#12 Cat Power – The Greatest

Chan Marshall’s much discussed flirtation with the mainstream was probably overstated. Sure, she traded her minimalism for Al Green’s backing band, but all she really did was swap one set of formal constraints (three chord blues) for another (countrified soul). She’s still spinning her twisted odes over deceptively simple accompaniment - and she even sounds like she’s having fun. The title track is one of her best and there are great pop songs lurking around every corner. The mainstream wishes it was this interesting.

#11 Jason Molina – Let Me Go, Let Me Go, Let Me Go

I don’t know how it seemed like a good idea. Shut yourself in a dark garage and record an album in three days about depression. But it worked - Molina’s darkness is a beautiful place to explore. With spare arrangements and haunting vocals pleading to lovers, to God, to immovable forces, this album captures familiar emotions in the most vivid sense. By the time you hear Molina uttering the album’s signature refrain, you’ll know just what he’s been through.

Continued tomorrow

Categories: Indie
Tags: best-of-lists; albums-2006

Move to Bremerton

2006-12-02T10:05:00.000+11:00

In this crazy modern world of ours, it's quite hard to find someone that complements you. Someone to share the best part of your life with.

And it's easy to decide that while there may be someone out there for you, maybe the 'there' is a long way away from where you are.

I was giving this some thought when I was reading various comments by people on the internet about how they meet fantastic people (usually online) but that they live on the other side of the country, or worse, overseas.

I know the feeling - you run into people briefly when on holidays or when chatting online and they seem to gel with you perfectly. Sure, you're only getting part of the story and with the internet thing there's still a high probability that its actually a room full of fourteen year old boys having a laugh. But you resent the fact that you don't even have the chance the find out whether there's any potential.

It seems like the world has shrunk enough to make global travel and communication easy, but not small enough that you don't ultimately have to look in your own neighbourhood for a partner.

Sometimes you even wonder how people in previous eras coped at all. But then you check yourself and realise that they got on just fine. People have been pairing up for generations and it largely seems to have gone ok.

Of course, you can see yourself as an exception. "Oh, anyone else could find someone in [insert your town here], but I just don't click with the [girls/guys]." But is this true? Or is it just easier to live in a fantasy world where the perfect person for you lives in Brisbane or Hoboken, rather than dealing with the complicated realities here at home?

Categories: Songs For The Ladies; Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: moving; transatlanticism; internet

If they don't put me away, well that'll be a miracle

2006-12-01T16:47:00.000+11:00

I know, I know - we've been through this before. Twenty-five is clearly too old to still like emo and curly hair can never been tamed into an Adelaide Fringe. But dammit - Brand New's The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me is good. Really good.

In particular, the track "Jesus Christ" is amazing. When I say amazing, I mean it sounds like Pinback (amazing) + Jimmy Eat World (less amazing) = still amazing. And the lyrics are clever and heartfelt and meaningful.

Here they sing about what awaits us after we die - and what kind of hope (or lack of) we have. I think a lot of us can sympathise when Jesse sings "And I, will die, all alone/And when I, arrive, I won’t know anyone."

This brings my total number of good emo albums for 2006 to four. Who would have thunk it?

Categories: Gospel; Indie
Tags: brand-new; second-hand

Leaving on a jet plane

2006-11-30T08:10:00.000+11:00

It's hard to believe its almost here, but today I picked up my tickets for my revised summer holiday. In less than two weeks, my brother and I will be in Singapore - beginning a trip that will take in Peninsular Malaysia and Sarawak. Nice.

All this makes work motivation very low and just adds to my sense that this is going to be a very strange season indeed.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: travel; holidays; complications

Cats in the cradle

2006-11-27T09:24:00.000+11:00

Maybe it's because I'm determined not to give up my hipsterness with age (and lose my edge to the kids) but I love the idea of all this indie rock for children. Who says being a parent should mean listening to awful shite?

Unfortunately, as this article points out - it may all backfire. After all, kids will rebel against whatever their parents demonstrate. Would I like the music I do if I'd been force-fed Gang of Four and Wire? It took me long enough to come round to liking Bob Dylan and Neil Young.

Maybe the key is to trick them. When your kids are around twelve, switch to listening to golden oldie radio and complain about how most hipster music is clanging noise as far as you can tell.

Categories: Indie
Tags: rock-for-toddlers; rebellion; golden-oldies

The Pitchfork affection

2006-11-24T13:02:00.000+11:00

Groan - another article about the so-called "Pitchfork effect". I think the Guardian have already run one of these, but here it is.

At least this time they mentioned Popmatters, Stylus and Drowned In Sound - my three favourites (even if I'm conflicted on two of them) - though only in passing.

I have to say I liked this quote:

[Todd] Burns founded Stylusmagazine.com in 2002 "after I realised I had tons of time on my hands in college and had no real inclination to become an alcoholic".

Nice.

Categories: Indie
Tags: music-press; internet; p****fork

Wall of books

2006-11-23T15:42:00.000+11:00

Today's interesting read belongs to Kathryn Hughes at the Guardian for her exploration of books as sacred objects. Can you actually throw the suckers out? Or do even bad books have some kind of instrinsic value?

Like Hughes, I was raised with an extraordinary appreciation for books and their value. We didn't have a TV until I was nearly 9 years old and reading has always been one of my family's top three favourite activities (bushwalking and moving interstate being the other two).

The physical safety of books was also paramount. My mother protected all paperbacks with plastic contact. Writing in books, bending pages - these were no-nos. Somehow my brother had this beaten out of him through four years of university english study. He's more than happy to scribble in books and fold over key sections. But when I see him do it, I still wince.

I have managed to overcome the fear of disposing of books - I've taken a few loads to second hand stores in recent years - but it's still extraordinarily difficult to part with them. I even have a little pang of regret when I think of those that have been sold even though I would never have read them again.

Maybe it's all very neurotic, but I like the fact that there's someone else out there who knows how I feel when I look at a bookcase jammed beyond capacity with words.

Categories: Talking Books
Tags: sacred-objects; throwing-stuff-out

New birds

2006-11-21T11:33:00.000+11:00

I haven't done this for a while, but I just wanted to share my favourite song lyric in a long while. Make sure you read it out loud in a Scottish accent.

Arab Strap - "New Birds"

You just have to be sure you're doing the right thing. I mean it's very easy to forget - she's was just sitting there in the pub with her new friends and her new life and her new hair and it might been five years but you'd know just to look at her.

I wasn't even sure it was her at first, I was ready to walk away but she smiled and called me over and we said hello for a bit. When we went back to our tables we were tried not to look over at each other and told our friends to stop staring.

I didn't see her for the rest of the night, but by closing time the beer's kicked in so I go up and speak to her and we end up going for a walk and talking about our new homes, our new jobs, our new friends and our new birds.

She says she's been going out with him now for about two and a half years, but they don't live together so he'd never find out. And you think about chasing her about school when you were wee and lying in your bed and listening to love songs and pretending they were about you. And the first time you asked her out she said no but one night you went to a wedding and when you came back to the pub she'd changed her mind and you went out. You remember the way she swung her arms when she held your hand but you can't remember how she kissed and now you've got the chance to find out.

But you have to remember there's this other kiss. And she's sitting at home, wondering where you are and what you're doing. And you work hard on this kiss and you know it inside out, it's as much yours as it is hers, and it took a long time to get right, it took months of practice and months of embarassment but now you've got it perfected and you've been looking forward to that kiss all week.

You can see her breath in the air between your faces as you stand in the leaves and she just asks you straight out if you want to come and stay at her flat. But you make sure you get separate taxis and you go home and there might be a slight regret and maybe you'll wonder what you missed but you have to remember the kiss that you worked so hard on - and you'll know you've done the right thing.

Categories: Indie; Songs For The Ladies
Tags: arab-strap; new-birds; mad-for-sadness

Buggered

2006-11-19T12:38:00.000+11:00

I had a huge day yesterday and it's going to take a while to process everything I'm sure. We had our Soul in the Suburbs event, which involved me trekking all over to some of our projects - taking food to people in Yass praying for rain, running a BBQ for the housing commission flats in Turner, cleaning up a pre-school in Page.

By the end of the day I was sunburnt and exhausted, but I still enjoyed the final worship service and even got a second wind when I went to a party for some grads from my work. Ended up falling into bed at 3 am.

It's been fun.

I'll just leave you with a photo of the jumping castle from our BBQ.

Nice, huh?

Categories: Gospel
Tags: soul-in-the-suburbs; community; jumping-castles

Where you been?

2006-11-16T23:15:00.000+11:00

Back from Perth. Blech.

Realising my life is going to be crazy-busy and slightly shite for a few weeks more. But then I'm going on holidays, so it's not so bad.

Realising I'm one of the only mid-twenties single guys I know. Realising the lack of competition still isn't going to do me any good.

Realising my blog is going through a bit of a directionless period. Must be the 15-month itch or something.

Realising I have nothing to post and my mind went to sleep a few hours ago.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: realisations; travel

Hiatus

2006-11-13T21:11:00.000+11:00

There'll be no Aropax Nation for the next couple of days since I'm away on work in the most isolated city in the world. They still have internet here (natch) but blogging from internet cafes isn't much fun.

Catch you round.

Dance music, dance music

2006-11-12T12:45:00.000+11:00

The kind of things that I ponder can be pretty random, none more so than the pressing question of the moment - whatever happened to dance music?

For a time there in the late 90s it really looked like electronic music was going to be the way of the future. Guitars were on their way out - even indie acts were using drum machines. Every self-respecting hipster owned copies of Decksanddrumsandrockandroll, Dig Your Own Hole, Second Toughest In The Infants and the like.

And then what?

Suddenly dance music was again confined to the ecstasy-and-glow-stick subculture. Most of us still listen to a bit of electronica but there haven't been the same superstar producers and albums that galvanise people in quite the same way we saw back then.

Maybe it's just a matter of time before rock goes out of fashion and the DJ comes back. As a wise man once put it:

I hear that you and your band have sold your guitars and bought turntables
I hear that you and your band have sold your turntables and bought guitars…

Categories: Indie
Tags: dance-music-for-hipsters; what-just-happened

Camera shy

2006-11-11T15:47:00.000+11:00

I don't know where this is going to go (I might turn into heartichoke) but I have now got a very swanky digital camera and may amuse myself from time to time with posting photos of myself and the world around me.

Today - some random shots from around town.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: photos; canberra

Ping

2006-11-10T10:41:00.000+11:00

Nothing much to report today, but I would like to point you to World Changers where they have a discussion on why we don't have enough church planters - so very true.

Also, Andrew Beaujon has linked to my comment on Mark Driscoll's physique. Maybe this will take some of the attention away from his theology for a little while!

Categories: Gospel
Tags: mark-driscoll; planting; treadmills; trackbacks

What we talk about when we talk about the emerging church

2006-11-09T17:18:00.000+11:00

Last night I had the opportunity to talk to my church's young adults group - around 35 twentysomething in all.

The idea was that I'd launch the idea of a new congregation - the one that's been kicking around most of the year - but also give everyone some food for thought.

What followed was basically my entire philosophy of mission in half an hour. If you were there and got information overload, I'm sorry but hardly surprised!

Of course, I was on my best behaviour but looking back I still managed to drop the phrase "getting high and sleeping with hookers".

Categories: Gospel
Tags: emerging; planting; really-rather-polite-preachers

Ted Haggard: The Aftermath

2006-11-06T10:25:00.000+11:00

It looks like the issue of evangelical pin-up boy Ted Haggard's spectacular fall-from-grace is going to attract a lot of soul-searching among Christian ministers. The leader of the National Association of Evangelicals' dabblings with meth and rent-boys is pretty big news and the schadenfreude exhibited by his opponents and detractors is unsurprising. We all like people getting some of their own medicine.

Mark Driscoll has some thoughts on how leaders can protect themselves from adultery. It's interesting that one of his concerns is about pastors' wives 'letting themselves go'. He doesn't lay the blame squarely at the wives' door (which would be horrendously unfair) but it is something you see a lot in Christian marriages. In fact Andrew Beaujon makes a similar observation about married Christian men in ministry - and Driscoll himself is looking distinctly pudgy these days. Could it possibly work both ways?

Out of Ur has some thoughts, which I will read through when I stop being distracted by the banner ad featuring glowing endorsement of a DVD by none other than...Ted Haggard.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: ted-haggard; mark-driscoll; soul-searching

How to review the Deftones

2006-11-04T17:52:00.000+11:00

So you want to review the new Deftones album Saturday Night Wrist, right? Well don't forget to include the following points and you'll be just fine:

Refer to "nu metal" and how the Deftones were never really part of the scene but you'll lump them in there anyway.
Compare it adversely to a previous album you prefer - most likely Around The Fur or White Pony.
Draw some connection with Chino Moreno's Team Sleep trip-hop side project and imply that the influence hasn't been entirely positive.
Ensure you make a comment about Annie Hardy's foul-mouthed guest appearance on "Pink Cellphone". You can like the first three minutes but make sure you suggest that everything after that point ruins the entire album.

See - easy.
Categories: Indie
Tags: deftones; reviewing; laziness

Something is wrong

2006-11-03T13:38:00.000+11:00

Here's something to ponder on your Friday:

What on earth makes thousands of Australians pop out and buy an album of glossy, personality-free, note-perfect Motown covers?

How the hell did Human Nature's second album of completely unnecessary retreads go to #2 on the charts?

With old soul compilations a dime a dozen, why would you pay $30 for the privilege of hearing a white-bread boy band blandify the classics?

Even better - does anyone buy these albums for themselves, or just for their mum and grandmothers? Are there really that many grandmothers having birthdays in November?

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: human-nature; killing-motown

Why the Right gets it wrong

2006-11-01T16:04:00.000+11:00

I should have known better than to read an interview with arch-Republican Newt Gingrich, but I did and I was struck by the lunacy of his answer to a question on poverty:

...my message would start with some pretty powerful words about faith and behavior. In America, political scientist James Q. Wilson has pointed out that if you do not get pregnant outside of marriage, if you don't get married before you're 20, and if you complete high school, then it is virtually impossible to be in poverty.

Would it in fact be more correct to say that if you live in poverty in America it's virtually impossible to not get pregnant outside of marriage or complete high school?

Categories: Gospel
Tags: politics; poverty; right-wing-nutbags

Snippets

2006-10-31T12:47:00.000+11:00

Not a full post today, but a sample of what I've been reading on the interweb.

Reese and Ryan split - A celebrity couple so long standing we don't even have a nickname for them. This is truly shocking. As a friend of mine pointed out, celebrity marriages should be counted in dog-and-cat years, so they nearly made their gold anniversary. I have a vague idea I used to pray for the end of their marriage so Reese would be available. Be careful what you wish for, kids.

Brian Littrell: God Opened Doors - I'm fairly certain God had nothing whatsoever to do with the Backstreet Boys' existence. I suspect it was the Other Dude.

The Truth About Pop - Popjustice.com tells it like it is with their ultimate pop music survey with juicy findings like "Madonna is the popstar you'd most like as a parent" and "17% of you want your popstars to be hairy, and 15% think that being able to sing is unimportant".

Partitioning Iraq - Why not? When it's worked so well in Ireland, India, Israel, Korea, Vietnam and Yugoslavia.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: random-tidbits

Ian Curtis Wishlist

2006-10-30T09:10:00.000+11:00

A great quote from last Friday's edition of Popmatters:

“Whereas some bands have the problems of losing their fan base due to things such as the band ‘selling out’ or the fans themselves just growing up, Xiu Xiu has the problem of losing fans to suicide.” —Chris Burden, performance artist

Can I just point out that even at my most psychologically unstable, I don't think I've ever managed to listen to a Xiu Xiu album in one sitting.

Categories: Indie
Tags: suicide; xiu-xiu; depressing-music

Après les garçons de l'été sont allés

2006-10-27T09:20:00.000+10:00

Living in a transient city like Canberra makes you realise the huge disparity in lifestyle between the locals and the nomads. People from Canberra tend to settle down early, have long-term friendships and close relationships with their families. The blow-ins that make up the rest of the population are a more footloose, disconnected lot. Some settle into the lifestyle and become the next generation of locals, but most tend to move on after a few years.

It's quite a challenge for the newcomer to make connections, because the locals seldom need you. They tend to still be in contact with their childhood friends, spend large amounts of time with their relatives and busy lives. New friends are often too much hassle.

For a newcomer with no connections, you're often looking for a family of sorts - what the social commentators call an 'urban tribe' - people who you can share life with. Unfortunately that's hard to develop given the short timeframes involved and the fact that other blow-ins are the only people who have time for you.

My experience has been that on several occasions I've made close friends and found myself in a 'gang' who socialise regularly - and then each time, someone core leaves town and the group dissolves.

There isn't really a solution. You have to keep on making new friends, enjoy them while they last and keep busy. But my motivation to keep doing it is waning.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: canberra; blow-ins; friendships; transience

How to dance architecturally

2006-10-25T16:03:00.000+10:00

An article on Stylus today that was a little bit more self-indulgent than the usual crop provoked some thought on my part (and much discussion in the comments section). We're talking an almost exclusive focus on the writer's internal thoughts and free-associations, as well as the use of the word "pellucid". You know the kind of thing.

Now, I know that my music writing can be a little bit pretentious, reference-heavy and obscure, but I am aware of this tendency and try to make my articles at least comprehensible and interesting to people other than myself.

It probably all comes down to why we feel the need to write about music at all. Is it purely for self-expression? Is it to recommend interesting and exciting songs? Is it to explore the deeper issues and connections between art and culture?

My approach tends to be all of the above, but I try to be aware of the fine line between self-expression and self-abuse. Some articles are like masturbation in public - you might be enjoying the experience but you shouldn't be surprised when others don't share your enthusiasm.

Categories: Indie
Tags: music-writing; self-indulgence; big-words

Movies of the times: The Children of Men

2006-10-24T14:51:00.000+10:00

The year is 2027 and an infertility epidemic means that no new babies have been born in 18 years. The world's youngest person, 'Baby' Rodrigo, has just died. Everywhere in the world has been destroyed by terrorism, war and disease. Britain retains some semblance of civilisation by enforcing a rigid police state and locking up refugees in horrific camps.

Our hero, Theo (Clive Owen), is a disillusioned revolutionary who gets drawn into a complicated and deadly situation involving a girl who just might hold the key to the future of mankind.

I haven't read the P.D. James book on which it is based, but writer-director Alfonso Cuaron's adaptation is profoundly affecting. The characters are lifelike and well-drawn, the action set-pieces are gripping and the random, graphic acts of violence are shocking.

Cuaron's biggest triumph is his refusal to paint his future world in a cheesy sci-fi way. By retaining all the music and fashions and architecture of our era, we see a world that has no more reason for reinvention and progress. We also realise that the world is not so dissimilar to our own.

Terrorism? Check.

Vilification and victimisation of refugees and foreigners? Check.

Infertility and the death of childhood? No quite, but close.

The Children of Men is a fascinating study of a dystopian future. It's also a revelation of our dystopian present.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: movie-reviews; children-of-men; future-days

Kum-ba-ya my Lord

2006-10-23T14:14:00.000+10:00

In Canberra City Walk some days, you'll see a small group of young, mostly Asian men standing around in a circle singing old Hillsong choruses. One of them has an acoustic guitar and they all clap along and sing with gusto.

Most people walk straight by and pay them very little mind, but it's an interesting case study in post-modern, post-colonial Christian mission.

Here we have the descendants of Christians converted by European missionaries to places like Timor and Papua and China, singing songs penned by middle-class Australians, in a secular Canberra marketplace.

The amazing thing is how absurdly out-of-place and culturally-inappropriate it is - despite the Europeanised Christianity and Anglo-Australian worship music - because somewhere in the last few decades Australian/Western culture moved on.

We no longer are interested in organised religion, cheesy Jesus songs and impersonal, didactic gospel presentation. We need a very good reason to investigate any one of the millions of truth claims and ideas in the world. What have you got to offer? Oh, a shopping-mall sing-a-long? Excuse me while I take this free stress test…

In the same way that a lot of early white missionaries took their beliefs to the rest of the world with dry sermons, dull hymns and Eurocentric cultural trappings, these guys are bringing the Good News wrapped up in something unappealing and irrelevant.

What we have is a Church that still hasn't woken up to realise that the rules of the game have changed.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: missiology; hillsong; marketplace-singing

Wrapping up

2006-10-19T16:11:00.000+10:00

Today I find myself in an interesting situation. I think back to the busy, stressful days of August and September and my only desire being to free myself from my chronic over-commitment.

Well, that problem looks like sorting itself out, but it's been replaced by another.

After all, my commitments for this year are coming to an end. My last few duties as an intern will occur over the next four weeks, my studies end at around the same time (only one more class and an exam to go) and I'm on top of my work. I'm (sensibly for once) not taking on any more commitments for now. Too much is up in the air for that.

But that suggests that I'm heading for a long hot summer with not much to do - and the revelation that my busyness was just a good excuse for my lack of connection to anyone.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: long-summer-days; end-of-commitment

Talking 'bout nuclear war

2006-10-18T09:51:00.000+10:00

It's official - North Korea considers UN sanctions to be a declaration of war and is probably getting ready to blow the shiznit out of us. Who would have thought?

For Cold War Kids like me, nuclear holocaust was a fascination. Then everyone had a good decade of laughing about how silly we all were and putting the idea in the same 'what were we thinking' basket as shoulder-pads and Boy George. But like any good fashion, holocaust-mania is back again.

It would be weird if we all went out with a bang after all.

As Sun Ra sang:

It's a motherfucker
Don't you know
If they push that button
Your ass gotta go

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: holocaust; nuclear-winter; north-korea

Got milk?

2006-10-17T12:55:00.000+10:00

Thanks to wwjb for revealing to me the option of buying milk over the internet. Who would have thought?

The 788 product reviews are pretty impressive:

"This is the goodest milk I've ever had!"

"Well, lets just say that I passed out to to the overwhelming almost-ninja-like greatness."

"I bought this milk a week ago and I LOVED IT! In fact, it was so awesome, I went back in time and told myself to buy more!!"

The people have spoken.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: tuesday-randomness; milk-over-the-internet

Growing up (in the best possible way)

2006-10-16T15:48:00.000+10:00

Mac McCaughan is a man who's been on my mind a bit recently, what with the excellent new Portastatic album and my recent acquisition of a second-hand Superchunk album I hadn't heard in years. I've even written a bit about him for a forthcoming stypod column.

Anyway, Popmatters' interview with him last week is fascinating because it looks at the declining public interest in musicians' output over time, irrespective of quality. McCaughan is a case in point, because a lot of his best music has been produced in his 40s, despite the high standard his early records set.

The other shining exemplar is the increasingly inaccurately-named Sonic Youth. Their latest album, Rather Ripped, is far better than I could possibly have expected. After all - where does a band have to go when they've reinvented rock at least three times in 25 years?

It makes me think of the dismissive way I've treated numerous bands and artists simply because after more than a decade of music-obsessiveness, I doubt their ability to suprise me. But why shouldn't the new release by stalwarts like Sonic Youth or Portastatic be better than the Beirut album?

Maybe it's because critics need trainwrecks, young bucks and return-to-form-rehab-albums to fill column inches. While the artists that matter just make the music they want to hear.

Categories: Indie
Tags: portastatic; sonic-youth; getting-older

Preaching the Second Coming

2006-10-12T16:45:00.000+10:00

When I was quite small, I spent an inordinate amount of time worrying about the (according to my parents) imminent return of Jesus. My primary concern was that any Second Coming was going to mean missing out on birthdays, trips to the coast, pocket money. I think Christians in the late 80s were filled with a curious mix of Cold War hysteria, pre-milennial tension and religious fervour. The idea that I would see the year 2006 seemed unlikely.

I'm not sure what happened. Maybe the milennium bug fizzer and the Left Behind overkill did it for most people. It's not something I hear about very often.

I think the Emerging Church movement has even gone a few steps further. By taking the focus of Christianity off the "get out of Hell free" theology of most evangelicals, a lot of emerging thinkers are placing much greater emphasis on the here and now. I have to commend this. A theology that gives merit to social justice for its own sake, environmentalism and art is one I can embrace. Coming to the understanding that the good things we do on Earth have enduring significance is exciting. But are we left with of the Return?

Studying the New Testament this semester has given me a fresh appreciation for how soon the early church thought Jesus would come back. Were they wrong? Did it affect their theology? How are we supposed to give primacy to promoting the Kingdom of God here on Earth but also remember the events that are yet to come? And how do you talk about the Second Coming without sounding like a right-wing Rapture nut?

I'm only starting the thought process on this topic and I'm keen for thoughts and insights. In my mind the Second Coming gives new urgency to our work here on Earth - creating a community that makes a difference in people's lives and causes others to recognise Jesus' impact on our world. It also can give us a greater hope. When we strive for change and difference, we are so often dulled and depressed by the battle against inertia, apathy and injustice. But we can rest assured that God's work will be completed in spite of everything - even in spite of us!

In the words of St John - "Come, Lord Jesus".

Categories: Gospel
Tags: second-coming; eschatology; left-behind; emerging

P.S. Can anyone spot the references to a doom metal band, a dance-punk act, a sophomore slump album, a hair-metal classic and a trip-hop nightmare? All unintentional.

Meetings and surprises

2006-10-10T15:49:00.000+10:00

When I was a youngster (like in about 2005 or something), I tended to be very control-freakish about things. That hasn't completely disappeared, but my willingness to just go with the flow is much greater. And the consequences are quite interesting.

Take for example the random middle-aged guy who approached me after church to say that he'd heard from my senior pastor that I was interested in church planting and would I like to go out to Queanbeyan with him to meet with a church planter.

Let's have a look at those factors:

* Random guy
* Queanbeyan (sorry, Darren!)
* Meeting with other random guy
* Church planting, which I'm currently trying to extricate myself from

I said yes, but wasn't really expecting much. Oh - and did I mention that it was at McDonalds? Nice.

Anyway, last night on the way to McDonalds, RG and I had a great old chat. And ORG turned out to be very cool and passionate and has a blog. Which is very 'emerging' of him.

I got home feeling encouraged and inspired. And with the sense that sometimes life takes unexpected turns.

Categories: Gospel; Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: planting; emerging; queanbeyan; surprises

Paid in full

2006-10-09T09:43:00.000+10:00

Our little group of church interns got together for a collaborative breakfast yesterday and it lasted until 6:30pm. Nice work, guys. So much coffee I don't think I will ever need to drink it again. So much bacon my arteries are only at half capacity. So much pineapple my lips are still sore.

The conversation was wide and varied but some key questions kept on cropping up.

How do you do more ministry while still earning a living?

What kind of ministries deserve being salaried positions?

What do you have to sacrifice when you take up paid ministry?

Take a look at the Apostle Paul. He argued that labourers deserve their wages, but he also chose not to be a financial burden on others. What is the deciding factor?

I don't know, but right now it's good to be unpaid.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: bacon; breakfast; money; internship; shitkicking

Birdsong

2006-10-07T18:12:00.000+10:00

I made it out to Namadgi National Park today for some peace and quiet. Of course, the moment you take away the normal noises of traffic and ipod music, you realise how full the silence really is - bird calls, lizards rustling in the leaves, the wind in the trees.

While Canberra is a smallish city that prides itself on it's status as 'Bush Capital' it's interesting how far out of town you have to go to hear nature rather than just see it.

The same goes with stars - the abandoned remains of the deep space tracking station remind you that unless you're an hour from town central, the sky is pretty empty.

Who would have thought - a rumination on how urban Canberra is?

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: birds; trees; stars; canberra

Housebound

2006-10-04T11:27:00.000+10:00

Sad news for me. My planned overseas odyssey will have to be postponed until such a time as international airfares are cheaper.

I went to the travel agent yesterday and was quoted a price for $3700 just for the basic round-the-world trip (Singapore, UK, USA) with at least another $1800 to get to West Africa. Given that my entire trip budget was in the order of $6000, I'm not exactly thrilled.

So travelling at Christmas is definitely out. And as Heartichoke tells me, winter is a crap time to visit the US anyway.

With the trip on the back-burner for now, I'm left with a whole bunch of other questions and possibilities. Watch this space - you may get some surprises.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: no-travel-for-me; change-is-as-good-as-a-holiday

Even Rocky had a montage

2006-10-03T11:17:00.000+10:00

This one's for Andy....

Cracked dot com presents the 80s montage hall of fame, including Rocky and Footloose.

Cue inspirational music.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: montages; 80s-movies

Popularity

2006-10-03T10:18:00.000+10:00

I had the distinct pleasure of watching Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby on the weekend. So much to enjoy and make you cringe. Go check it out, kids.

Interestingly enough, Ricky's trashy, gold-digging wife was played by Leslie Bibb, who doesn't appear to have done much in the last few years since her teen-soapie Popular got axed. This got me reminiscing about the good ol' days of student life, watching trashy TV in the middle of the day. And I have to say, Popular was a favourite. Probably because it didn't have a talking doll or Ridge Forrester.

What it had instead was a wicked sense of humour, some bizarre cultural references (the "Christmas Carol" and "Scarlet Letter"-inspired episodes, especially) and the most over the top high school caricatures you can imagine. And, of course, the ugly, unpopular girl who was too hot for that to be even slightly plausible.

Ah, good times, good times.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: popular; daytime-soaps; teen-cliches

Clips for free

2006-09-30T13:36:00.000+10:00

Thoughts on watching the JTV most requested videos this morning:

Tapes 'n' Tapes - "Cowbell" [youtube]
Oh, I like this band! Didn't they used to be called Clap Your Hands Say Yeah?

Red Riders - "Slide In Next To Me" [youtube]
Nice recreation of the sound and look of a minor 1981 new wave hit. But the guy from the Psychedelic Furs wants his checked sweater back.

Scissor Sisters - "I Don't Feel Like Dancing" [youtube]
Millions of little boys the world over are watching this in their living room and telling their mums they want to grow up to be homosexual popstars.

The Killers - "When You Were Young" [youtube]
The earnestness! The chiming guitar melodies! This sounds just like Motor Ace and I'm afraid that I mean that in a bad way.

Categories: Indie
Tags: video-clips; saturday-morning-ennui

Okonokos

2006-09-29T10:42:00.000+10:00

As any self-respecting hipster knows, My Morning Jacket are the best country-style, old-school rock 'n' roll band in the world. Band of Horses come close, but they're a little bit too Seattle-indie-rocker to be the true heirs to Creedence and Crazy Horse.

And what could be more classic rock 'n' roll than a double live album?

So here we have the outstanding Okonokos, out now on CD and soon to be on DVD. It's a huge, swaggering beast of an album and it has all of my personal MMJ highlights from recent years - "Lay Low", "One Big Holiday", "I Will Sing You Love Songs" and "Steam Engine".

Anyone who's used to the grain-silo reverb that normally surrounds Jim James' voice on the albums will be a little bit thrown by his clear, untreated vocals. Still, the live sound is unmistakably MMJ and it all makes me wish I hadn't missed their single Australian visit back in 2004.

Guys, please come back!

Categories: Indie
Tags: my-morning-jacket; okonokos; double-live-albums

Irony

2006-09-27T14:25:00.000+10:00

I just had an al fresco lunch with some of my contacts in a rather large pharmaceutical company. Nice day for it.

The best part of it was that I managed to score an Aropax pen. When I showed it to one of my co-workers and explained what it was, she responded, "Well, you don't look depressed, so I wouldn't take it personally."

If only!

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: aropax; drug-company-merch; bright-orange-pens

Why so bad?

2006-09-25T16:54:00.000+10:00

I don't know whether this is just me, or if this is a recurring problem, but I absolutely cannot handle "mission talks".

Over my life, I have heard a whole variety of people talk in churches about missions - both missionaries and non-missionaries - and I can honestly say that around 3 or 4 of them have not left me feeling like shit.

Quite frankly, it doesn't matter how much I'm doing, how far away or close to God I am, how much of my income I'm giving away, how passionate I am about mission, I always feel condemned. Why? Because the key message appears to be that you are a failure. You are a comfortable middle-class, selfish Westerner and the entire problems of the world are your responsibility to fix.

Is this just my insecurity? Or is it that 98% of missionaries are so concerned about shaking people out of their complacency that they are willing to wear some collateral damage from their scorched-earth sermons? I have never, ever felt more inclined to support social justice projects or missions after a talk by a missionary. All I want to do is walk out in disgust.

This isn't because I disagree with them.

I agree passionately that we have a responsibility to care for those beaten down by life and society and economics. Over the last few years, I have been searching myself for how I can take up my role in making things better. But nothing makes me feel less inclined to be generous and supportive than someone damning me from up the front for my failure to live up to my calling.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: two-thirds-world; mission; social-justice; guilt-and-damnation

Can we be friends?

2006-09-21T16:07:00.000+10:00

On my church young adults camp the other weekend, I heard one of the guys grumbling about the directive that "guys pray with guys, girls pray with girls". What struck me was that I hadn't even taken it in. It's something I've heard so many times it no longer bothers me.

Now, I'm not suggesting that we should mandate boy and girl sharing-and-caring - I appreciate that some people have issues trusting the opposite sex for valid reasons - but come on...if a guy and a girl are close and feel comfortable praying for each other, then why not?

Close cross-gender friendships are definitely rare and there's a common view that they're actually impossible. That I realise. But is this just another case of Christians taking conventional wisdom and culture and giving it some kind of authority?

I recently stumbled across Dan Brennan's blog, where he does a great series on exactly this topic. You may not agree with every thing he says, but it's thought-provoking stuff.

Maybe it's just because my life has been so enriched by my female friends, that I wonder about the lost opportunities for others. They've certainly not been without their ups and downs and complications but on the whole, I've learnt a lot.

Could it be that a lot of the problems that singles face in churches is the subtle segregation that forces our relationships to be all-or-nothing? I hear so many stories of casual coffee meet-ups being taken as near-proposals-of-marriage and I see so much awkwardness when people want to get to know someone better without the pressure of a 'relationship'.

If cross-gender friendships were more common, then I can't help but suspect that the relationships and marriages that ensue will be more natural and better considered.

Am I reading too much into a simple camp policy? Perhaps, but I see a trend within the church towards seeing one member of the opposite sex as your (prospective or actual) spouse and all others as temptations. I think that does a disservice to everyone involved. What's the point in claiming to treat a girl as a 'sister in Christ' if I refuse to engage with her as Christ did? Is this showing trust or love?

Obviously there are challenges, but I agree with Brennan when he proposes that avoidance is not the best policy. In my own relationships, I've learnt (and am still learning) some lessons the hard way. With the best intentions in the world, sexual dynamics are going to be there and its easy to abuse a situation: to use the others' trust in your being 'just friends' to manipulate your way into a romantic relationship; to take advantage of someone's unreciprocated interest to feed your ego or libido; to demean and harm someone who has been open and honest with you.

I have often done the wrong thing. I've hurt others and I've been hurt. But do I regret the friendships and wish I'd stayed in an all-male clique? Hell, no.

Categories: Gospel; Songs For The Ladies
Tags: cross-gender-friendships; hard-lessons

T-shirt weather

2006-09-20T09:36:00.000+10:00

I love the shirts they've got over at Threadless - they're cheap, funny and - best of all - limited editions.

The latest bunch has my favourite slogan in a while:

If you don't get it - trust me, it's funny.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: hipster-t-shirts; def-leppard; one-armed-drummers

No major awards?

2006-09-18T22:05:00.000+10:00

It's been an almost annual occurrence for over a decade - the release of a new Starflyer 59 album, destined to get rave reviews and then be ignored by all and sundry. Oh, the injustice of it all.

Here's a potted history of Starflyer 59 and the listening public.

1994 - Release Silver. Good shoegazer album. Christian kids pick it up because it's one of the two Christian albums that didn't suck that year. Go on to write blogs called "notyetfinished" and other such crap. No one else really notices.

1995 - Release Gold. Also very good shoegazer album, but really slow and depressing. Christian kids who bought Silver hate it. Others realise that it's awesome and grow up to write blogs called "Turn It Up To !!". That's about it.

1997 - Release Americana. Their self-described Black Sabbath album. It's not actually doom metal, but it rocks. Not many people buy it. Jason gets kind of depressed about that.

1998 - Release The Fashion Focus. Reveals new classic pop direction. Pretentious music critics realise that SF59 aren't just My Bloody Valentine rip-offs but are the most awesome band ever. Still no record sales.

1999 - Release Everybody Makes Mistakes. Continues new classic pop direction. Even more pretentious music critics love it. You've still never heard of them, though, have you?

2001 - Release Leave Here A Stranger. Recorded in mono and jam-packed with hazy, dreamy guitar pop. Many people consider it their best. Well, many of their 2000 or so fans worldwide.

2003 - Release Old. Release new glam-inspired swaggering rock 'n' roll direction and obsession with ageing. Jason still only thirty, but clearly the whole thing is getting to him.

2004 - Release I Am The Portuguese Blues. Fairly derivative bluesy rock, but still better than a lot of bands' best work. Doesn't do SF59 any favours with the record-buying public.

2005 - Release Talking Voice vs. Singing Voice. Returns to the sounds of Everybody Makes Mistakes and Old to great effect. By this point I think everyone gets how this works.

My Island came out last week and it's fantastic. It sounds just like Old, which is a GOOD THING. Old is one of the best albums ever released by anyone. To release another album like it is a very wise move.

Categories: Indie
Tags: starflyer-59; new-album; will-anyone-notice

Tool are awesome?

2006-09-18T10:46:00.000+10:00

I don't really have a lot to say about this except that Zak Sally, former bassist from Low, the slowest, softest band in the world, has written an article for the Village Voice about the awesomeness of Tool. The mind boggles.

I'm not really into Tool, and that's in spite of years of attempted indoctrination by friends, but the article is so well written and funny that they almost sound appealling. Nice work, Zak.

In unrelated news, I'm setting the challenge for the most mis-matched purchases ever to be made in a record store. On Saturday, I picked up Season Three of 'Gilmore Girls' and Killswitch Engage's 'The End of Heartache'.

Exactly.

Categories: Indie
Tags: tool; zak-sally; gilmore-girls; killswitch-engage; contrary

Friendship update

2006-09-17T22:59:00.000+10:00

It's been observed many times, usually with a wink and a smirk, that the gender-ratio of my close friends may be a little off-balance. As Meg puts it - "You're always getting sprung having coffee with some chick."

Tonight after church, Dave and Dani were making the usual comments and, foolishly perhaps, I defended myself by referring to how few girls I'd hung out with this week. Foolishly, because when I actually counted, the figure wasn't exactly few. It was, in fact, six. Six different women. And would have been seven if Dani hadn't been out of town when I texted her to see if she wanted to grab coffee.

Well what can I say? If my male friends didn't keep pissing off to more urban climes (Andy, Stu, now Pete), I'd still have some to hang out with.

And dammit - I like hanging out with girls.

So there.

Categories: Songs For The Ladies
Tags: coffee; platonic-dates; gender-ratio

Hipster metal

2006-09-15T11:46:00.000+10:00

I've chronicled my growing interest in metal elsewhere on this blog, so it was exciting to read a panel discussion in Decibel magazine involving Mountain Goat and metalphile John Darnielle and others discussing the idea of 'hipster metal'.

At risk of sounding really pretentious and totally-two-minutes-ago, I covered pretty much the same ground in a Stypod piece a little while ago.

Although, Darnielle really nails it when he points out that ironic appreciation of a genre is still appreciation - just with a heavy dose of self-preservation. Sounds familiar!

I'll just go back to listening to Isis, shall I?

Categories: Indie
Tags: metal; isis; darnielle; gateway-drugs

Worship

2006-09-14T16:55:00.000+10:00

Last semester I had to write a bible college essay on the relationship between church services and evangelism. I wish it had been this semester - I could have just plagiarised Tim Keller.

In an article for The Resurgence, Keller (the head dude at Redeemer Presbyterian in NYC) outlines why he doesn't think that there needs to be any separation between praising God and communicating God. The former does the latter.

This was exactly my thesis, but some of the specific points he makes are particularly interesting.

For example (my paraphrase):

(1) Churches are stuck in a vicious cycle where we only have Christians in attendence, so little or no effort is made to make the worship comprehensible or relevant to non-Christians. So no one feels comfortable bringing their non-Christian friends. So there are only Christians in attendence. Etc etc.

(2) We don't explain what is happening to people who might be unfamiliar with church traditions. A lot of services could do with sub-titles or a manual. The cause is the same as for (1).

(3) The quality of the art and aesthetics is generally low. People cut the art and music in a church a lot of slack when they know the people involved. Newcomers are going to be less forgiving and that's going to affect how they see our faith. Half-arsed art = half-arsed faith.

Anyway, food for thought for anyone involved in worship or church ministry.

Categories: Gospel
Tags: worship; tim-keller; half-arsed

Gonads

2006-09-13T12:11:00.000+10:00

It's been a weird week, made weirder by how much I've been thinking about genitals.

Not in a dirty way, you understand, but in a just-finished-reading-a-book-about-a-hermaphrodite way. Jeffrey Eugenides' Middlesex is quite possibly the best book I've read in years. And it's all about a little girl who grows up to be a man.

It's opened my eyes to the multitude of possible hormone/chromosome/genital configurations there - truly staggering stuff. It reminds me of a video we watched back in year ten about the topic, complete with truly disturbing footage.

Here's just a sample of some of the possibilities that are out there:

5-alpha reductase deficiency - 46,XY (male) but born with outwardly female genitals due to lack of dihydrotestosterone in the womb. Male traits appear at puberty. Can go either way, really.

Androgen insensitivity syndrome - 46XY (male) but outwardly female due to lack of response to testosterone. Leads to being a tall, big-breasted, infertile woman with interior testicles.

Klinefelter's syndrome - 47XXY male, generally infertile, tall, lanky and bad-tempered.

Life truly is an amazing thing. Just be glad I didn't post pictures.

Categories: Talking Books; Miscellaneous
Tags: ambiguous-genitalia; intersex; middlesex

Back for more

2006-09-08T14:14:00.000+10:00

Clearly the Sydney Bluebottle Kiss show two weeks ago wasn't sufficient, because I was down at the ANU Bar last night for their Canberra show.

It was an altogether different beast from Sydney. Only about 60-70 people in attendance (nowhere near capacity) and just the four boys this time. Faced with a scattered audience seated at tables, Jamie opened by asking us to all come forward. "If you just sit there we'll stand around like My Bloody Valentine and stare at our shoes. But if you show some enthusiasm we'll give you a show worthy of Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band." We dutifully stood up, danced a bit and the band came good on their promise.

Unlike Sydney, instead of playing their new album in its entirety, the band took us through a mixture of oldies and newies. The set list looked something like:

Your Mirror Is A Vulture
Nova Scotia
Little Black Dahlias
Fire Engine
Last Cinema
Something Tiny
Harold Holt
A Little Bit Of Light
Smother It In Honey
The Black Birds
Hasten The Blows

Give Up The Ghost
Gangsterland

I've been waiting three years to see them play "Give Up The Ghost" so I'm glad I didn't settle for just the Sydney show. Despite the presence of only one member of BBK circa 1999, the band ripped through it like it was the only thing that mattered in the whole world. For those four minutes, it was.

Categories: Indie
Tags: more-bluebottle-kiss; doesn't-he-like-any-other-bands?

No one ever said journalism was easy

2006-09-07T16:39:00.000+10:00

At latest count, I am a proud contributor to three (3) publications. This may seem like a lot when you're a busy Assistant Manager dude, theology student and church intern - and yes, it is a lot. I was out of my mind to take on another one. But I did. Because it sounds cool.

Mustard Seed Magazine is going to be a free, print-edition mag aimed at young people (15-24ish), with a bit of a focus on genuine, liveable faith. It's not in publication yet, but there's a blog where the editor, Neal, posts some articles and gives a bit of a flavour of what is to come.

Anyway, my magnum opus, the conclusion of my reflections on Christian rock, should be appearing online shortly. Stay tuned.

The other magazines are also tootling along. My review of Andrew O'Connor's Tuvalu went up today on Popmatters to universal acclaim (well, one of my co-workers liked it!)

Categories: Gospel; Talking Books
Tags: writing; magazines; mustard-seed

Michiko Kakutani will beat your ass

2006-09-06T14:35:00.000+10:00

I don't know how many book geeks read my blog, but you can't genuinely call yourself one if you aren't aware of the acerbic Queen of cutting down tall poppies, Michiko Kakutani of the New York Times. When I first started reading her reviews a few years ago, I commented to my brother "I'm not sure she actually likes anything!"

Still, I have to admire someone who can disregard the critical consensus and call a spade a big stinking pile of shit. When I started writing for Popmatters, I determined to be an even more caustic Kakutani, but I suspect it's not working. I like too many books.

Nevertheless, there's a bit of the MK creeping through in my latest review of the lad-non-fiction-lit internet dating extravaganza "Millions of women are waiting to meet you". Now, I loved the book. It was funny, sad, illuminating - all good things. But I was compelled to hammer it for its outdated and simplistic depiction of gender relations (which is actually a pretty minor quibble).

My friend Stu called me up while I was writing the review. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm reviewing a book. Writing a damning critique of its views on gender."

"Was it funny?"

"Hell, yeah."

"Then write that it was funny. Don't bother with the rest of that crap."

"How am I going to squeeze 1000 words out of that? Nah, I'm doing a hatchet job."

Michiko would be proud. Or possibly not. An old article in McSweeny's plausibly suggests that she is actually writer Colin McEnroe in drag. Anything's possible with Michiko.

Categories: Talking Books
Tags: michiko-kakutani; reviewing-books; hatchet

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

2006-09-04T23:48:00.000+10:00

As you can probably tell by the scarcity and brevity of my recent posts, I'm still pretty busy and the rest of September is looking packed.

Of course my irony-detector has been blowing a fuse over the fact that this weekend's church camp, entitled 'Be still and know that I am God', is causing me stress because I have too much to do and can't spare a whole weekend.

Nice.

Categories: Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: camps; irony; stillness

The ladies

2006-09-04T23:35:00.000+10:00

I've bitched a bit in the these parts about the girl situation here in the nation's capital - and I won't retract that - but I'm feeling slightly better about the old place given recent developments.

And wouldn't you like to know what they are?

Well, tough. Canberra's too small and too many people read my blog. No dice.

Categories: Songs For The Ladies
Tags: gossip

Travel - but of the fun kind

2006-09-02T15:29:00.000+10:00

Right now the thing foremost in my mind is a holiday. Preferably a long one, involving a beach somewhere. It's really distracting.

As Andy pointed out yesterday, getting some travelling done may ease the itchiness in my feet and allow me to make a better choice about whether to stay in Canberra or not. So I'm taking some definitive steps.

Or at least buying Lonely Planet guides. The man at the bookshop looked at my guide books for West Africa and the US and commented dryly "I wonder which one is more dangerous."

My best guess right now is about 8 weeks off in the summer with a round-the-world ticket. I will obviously try to catch up with my dear friend Catherine in the UK. I'm really keen on West Africa, especially Ghana, as a destination (and have been for some time) given the key attributes of cheap beer, awesome funk-fusion music, beautiful beaches, grinding poverty and chloroquine-resistant malaria. Sierra Leone has all the above but with the added possibility of civil unrest. I might also do a cross-country trip across the USA - although it will be pretty icy in February in the places I want to visit.

Here's to travel - of the fun kind.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: travel; ghana; usa; malaria

Travel, travel, travel

2006-08-30T17:29:00.000+10:00

I'm a bit over all the travel I do for work, mainly because it's never exotic locations like Tahiti or Paris, but repeated short trips to Sydney. Nothing wrong with Sydney, but there's only so much you can do in a day or two. And that's all I'm getting this time.

Anyway, the upshot is, probably not much blogging this week. Go and read a book or something.

Categories: Talking Books
Tags: aropax-nation-better-than-war-and-peace?

In which I finally succumb

2006-08-28T22:47:00.000+10:00

I'm not usually someone to embrace viral art projects, but this idea struck me as being especially funny. After a couple of beers.

You may beg to differ.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: stupidity; snakes-on-a-meme

Curiosity

2006-08-28T17:10:00.000+10:00

Curiosity killed the cat and it's sure as hell got the better of me.

My Blogpatrol stats show up a regular reader of this blog who always accesses it by googling a fairly uncommon girl's name, which takes you to this page.

You know who you are. I don't. But it's got me thinking.

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: lurkers; curious-cats

Doubt Seeds live and electric

2006-08-27T13:20:00.000+10:00

Because I'm a music obsessive, I drove all the way to Sydney and back last night to see Bluebottle Kiss' album launch, despite the fact that they'll be here in Canberra in a few weeks. The difference? Last night was a 13-piece band playing the entire album. Canberra won't be.

If you weren't there, I'm really sorry, but you missed one of the gigs of the year.

All was as advertised. There was the standard four piece line-up, augmented for individual songs by keys, trumpet, saxophone, trombone, second drum-kit and four girls, all in white, singing back-up vocals. And Sarah Blasko on one song. It was beautiful.

The highlights of the night were just about every song, but special mention must go to the duelling guitar solos in "The Black Birds", the swirling instrumental beauty of "Miranda" and Jamie Hutchings' torch-singer rendition of "Silent, Golden" (including crowd-surfing moment). Honourable mention to one of the backup singers who smiled and swayed all through the set. She looked like she was happier to be there than anyone else and it was a beautiful sight.

Holding out for a space-time-warping Canberra show.

The set-list:

Your Mirror is a Vulture
Nova Scotia
Sheffield Brides
The Weight of the Sea
Scrub the Mist
Sailors Knot
Fire Engine
Slight Return
A Little Bit of Light
Little Dissapearer
Dream Audit
Little Black Dahlias
The Judas Hands
White Rider
Speak Up Memory
Harold Holt
The Women Are An Army
The Black Birds
Miranda
Silent, Golden

ENCORE:
Everything Begins and Ends at Exactly the Right Time

Father's Hands

Categories: Indie
Tags: bluebottle-kiss; doubt-seeds; album-launch-with-full-band

Nasty

2006-08-26T10:16:00.000+10:00

I've recently been serving on an interview panel at work - my first.

In reality, I've only had about 7 serious job interviews in my life, and only 3 since finishing my graduate program. Consequently, my interview style isn't so much a "technique" as a flight-by-the-seat-of-my-pants. Which does make one wonder what I'm doing on the panel.

After the first couple of days, I thought of myself as a gentle, fair, easygoing interviewer. Only to be told by my grad that the other grads were describing me as the "bad cop" of the panel. I'll give them "bad cop"!

Actually, I did get a bit harsher as the final day progressed. After sitting through a dozen answers to the same question, my tolerance was getting a bit low and I may have phrased my questions in a blunter way than normal.

Overall - good experience and I hope I haven't scarred the lives of any aspiring pulic servants!

Categories: Miscellaneous
Tags: interviewing; bad-cop; tough-but-fair

In which I finally give up

2006-08-22T12:28:00.000+10:00

All my life, I've been trying my hardest just to fit in with the people around me. Since I've been a church-goer for most of my 25 years - at first by default, then later by choice - a lot of my time has been spent trying to fit in with my co-religionists. It's not easy.

When I was younger, I felt a nagging sense that I wasn't doing things right. I didn't act the right way, or feel or think the things that I was supposed to.

I always suspected that things would change eventually. I would hit some ripe old age (possibly 21) and would suddenly "get" it. I'd become just like the people around me. Sure, I may become slightly more boring and even enjoy listening to Hillsong, but I'd be happy because people would like me and I wouldn't have to try so hard.

Over the years, I've tried a few things. First off, I tried to know as much as the biggest Christian intellectuals. I bought shelf-loads of books and immersed myself in a rational, defensible belief-system. Only problem was, there were things I couldn't grasp and none of it seemed to make any difference.

At other times, I've tried being super-involved - super-committed. Take on as many ministries and tasks as one person can handle. But none of the ministries are particularly fulfilling and most of it's just time-filler. Hand-holding services for sheltered Christians.

I've even tried the charismatic thing. Worshipping a certain way. Having the right experiences and gifts. Getting all excited about things. But I feel like a fake - like I'm manufacturing something that others have naturally.

I'm not even that good at being an "emerging" Christian. I'm too uptight about somethings and too flexible on others. I'm not burning with compassion for the poor or excitement for new ministries. Most of the people in the "conversation" sound like wankers and I've got little time for that.

Actually, I'm just tired.

So guys - it's over. No more faking. You win. I can't compete with your spiritual depth, with your passion, with your awesome relationship with God.

I've just got a half-arsed faith the size of a very small mustard seed and a lot of the time I can't even remember where I left it.

If that's not enough, then so be it. There's nothing more I can do.

Categories: Gospel; Old Sad Bastard Music
Tags: faking-it; giving-in